Funny how the mind plays with your guitar strings, strumming in chords that bewilder and disembide. You can't seem to identify the emotions at present, only to regret it soon after. My brother and his family visited yesterday and my nephew stayed over for the night. I was humming him to sleep, playing music from my phone and couldn't get this verse out of my head..

When I'm trying to keep,
my head above your charms,
trying to stay calm.
But I don't know if I'll make it,
Or if I ever will,
Just don't leave me stranded here, (don't leave me stranded)
Don't leave me stranded,
In your arms.
-Grey Ocean by Lior

Maybe it just means more to me than it should...

Nothing has changed. Still feel rather empty. The weekend's not helping. The day has relatively been going like:
blink.........blink blink........shut up!.....blinkblink.....
open book.......blink blink.....

Effortlessly, I sought solace in numbing myself with episodes of one of my favourite tv shows. Nothing like American fiction to distract yourself from mundane reality. Is it strange that I feel sad for the antagonist, the man who is the thorn in the world's side? He gets all the beautiful women, has all the money but is never happy. So what if he's evil? So what if he has a crappy father? Can't he just kill him off for evilness sake? Well....at least he got to nail Lana before the boy scout. Cheers Baldy!

....forever stuck in a war.

Have you ever had the feeling that there is something amiss in your life but you just can't detect the anomaly? Can't seem to concentrate on the simplest of tasks these days. No appetite on an empty stomach. My mind wanders when I'm in the shower. Rides to campus last forever. Lecturers seem to speak in a different frequency then my own. Friends too. Speaking to people have become meaningless affairs, much less making new acquaintances, which have become quite a drag. It's not that I hate our daily interactions, just that I can't seem to relate much these days. Everyone is running around in their own world. Or is it just me?
.....I miss the smiles.

Honestly...I don't really like to indulge in political discussions. Call me apathetic but til the shit really hits the fan, I'm gonna stay blissful in ignorance. However, u can't help but feel amused at our local-born attempts for 'real' democracy. Case in point, a(n in)famous political group leader got arrested again for having an unregistered protest. Isn't it ironic that to really protest against the state, you have to ask them for permission? I feel like protesting against the fact that you have to register. You can imagine yourself at the office,
"Excuse me! I'd like to register for a protest."
"On what matter will you be protesting?"
"Err...about having to register to protest."
"Ok...pls fill up this form here. Registration will take a few working days and we will contact you if it is approved and when to collect your permit."
"A few working days? But I wanted to protest tonight...my people are all outside...Damn! The public should know about this. Give me another of those forms..."

It's been raining for a while. No signs of stopping anytime soon. Can't complain though. You gotta love it. Peaceful. Mother Nature washing away the sins of Man. It's a new day.
...best things in life are free

Life is full of disappointments. Especially when you find yourself lying to nobody but your own self. My only failure is that I should have expected as much.
...the heart never forgets

Note to self:
Do not mumble/ talk to oneself in public as some people might take it as insulting.

...now go back to work.

Dude...i got an issue.
Shoot!
I'm kinda in love with this girl but she doesn't really know me.
Aren't we all...

1. Obsessive compulsive(stupid genes)
   
2. Academically suicidal(stupid school)
   
3. Sleep deprived(stupid bed)
   
4. Itchy fingers(stupid white sticks)
   
5. Itchy feet(stupid good music)
   
6. Itchy throat(stupid fancy glasses)
   
7. Itch (stupid hormones)
   
8. Brokeblack(stupid wallet)
   
9. Broken promises(stupid ego)
   
10. Lying Fucker(stupid u)
11. Fucking Liar(stupid me)
    
12. Mat(dumbass)

....and these are a few of my favorite things...